They were
together for almost a year. Ana had very little contact during this time with
her parents, brother Juan or her two sisters. However, she spent alot of time
with Eduardo, Carlos' two year old when they had visitation privileges. Eduardo
would cry when he had to leave. The doctor and nurse spent their free nights at
Guelaguetza or dancing at the Grand Avenue Night Club. They were deeply in love;
one day I heard Ana say to Carlos privately, "Kiss me. Kiss
me as if it were the last time." Then came the proposal while riding on
Mr. Toad's Wild Ride at Disneyland.
Nurse Ana Carolina was an excellent
nurse. Only one time did I have to discipline her for being late and with a
little alcohol on her breath. I told her, "This can never happen again; med
center cannot and will not tolerated this. You are an excellent nurse, but I
will be required to terminate your employment if this happens again. It never
happened again."
A marriage date was set, but love can be very cruel.
Then SUDDENLY Doctor Ortiz returned to his wife. When he told Ana she stood
there in shock silent. "You can understand, can't you? You'll be alright
Carolina; I do love you, but I have to go back to my family. I'm really sorry; I
don't want to hurt you. I still love you too." Ana remained motionless in shock
and anger. She said nothing for a long minute....then "EXCUSE ME!!!" and she
quickly walked away. She cried all afternoon. "Come back to me. He will return
to me; I know he will." And finally, "I know he won't."
It was an overdose
suicide attempt.
By luck or providence Paula found Ana about 6 P.M. and
called 911. Ana was rushed to our med center where I pumped out her stomach.
Doctor Ortiz assisted, but he and Ana never exchanged words.
After several
hours in recovery I took her to her apartment. "Ana, you still have your job
with us. We all love and care about you. The nurses want to buy you a new cat."
Ana CRIED loudly..."Cat, cat, why, my GOD? I killed Cat." When she calmed down,
"You know, I really didn't want to die, but my heart was sliced in half, and I
wanted to make the world go away. "I felt like going
out and getting wasted, but I took the pills instead."
Then I asked her,
"Can I share some things with you?" Let me read you some Bible verses that I
looked up to share with you. The first one is Psalm 27:10 'When my father and
mother forsake me, then the LORD will take me up.' I know about your family
life, and that it isn't your fault. Then over in John the 6th. chapter JESUS
said, HE will in no wise cast out anyone that comes to HIM. Carlos failed you,
but not everyone will. And I love the verse in Philippians where it says to
forget the past and press forward. When I stumble I get up and try to do better.
Life goes on." "Will you help me?" she asked. "You
bet I will. Ana, I know it's going to be hard, but you are going to have to
forgive Doctor Ortiz. JESUS taught forgiveness." "I can't kill Carlos?" she
smiled, "I know it is good that he is going back home, but it is hard, really
hard for me to take." "Ana, I understand. Right now you need Paula and me and
some other friends, and you need JESUS. Romans 10:13 says, if Ana calls upon the
name of the LORD, Ana will be saved. We are all here for you." She threw her
arms around me and said, "Thank you. I won't give up. I'll try. My heart will go on. After all tomorrow is another
day."
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